I think by now everyone is aware that there was an earthquake in Utah on Wednesday with the magnitude of 5.7 and several aftershocks throughout the day. It seemed like everyone here was acting like the world was coming to an end.
Meanwhile, I couldn’t understand what the big deal was. I’ve been in bigger and worse quakes where we didn’t have power or water, the ground shook so bad it destroyed the steps leading to our upstairs apartment. This was in LA of course.
Given the fact that I was so cool about the situation, my husband left for work, leaving me at home with our 2 year old. While all my girlfriends were texting to check in and in shock (pun intended) that he had left us, I couldn’t understand why they were making it a big deal — and then my mom called him.
She told him he needed to come home because he needed to be with me. That I’m always so tough, she never knows when it’s real and when it’s a front. So just in case I was scared or nervous but wouldn’t show it, she wanted him home with me.
You never know people’s perceptions of you until they talk behind your back and it gets back to you. My mom is as tough as nails and she raised me to be just as tough and independent like her so I was surprised to hear about her phone conversation with him.
For the record, no I wasn’t scared or nervous. I was more concerned about the fact that I didn’t know how to shut off the gas to the house in case we had another big quake. And that I didn’t have an earthquake kit ready because, c’mon, it’s Utah. Since when?
But it did remind me that it’s okay to allow people to be there for me.
I’m so used to taking care of myself, working hard and fighting for what I want, having that “I got this” attitude all the time, and never depending on anyone, that it’s like a foreign language at the thought of opening up to the idea of relying on someone else. Even if it is just for emotional support.
I’m also a mom now, so I have to be tough for my son. I want him to grow up fearless, strong, and independent and the best way to do that is to lead by example. For us Christians, we know our strength comes from God (Isaiah 41:10) so I will never show fear, especially in front of our son.
Steven had never been in an earthquake before so he didn’t know what we were supposed to do. His expertise is in the tornado field as a midwest boy. So in this case, I got us. He was just following my lead. I will admit, even if he himself was clueless on what to do, it felt really good knowing he was next to me trying to figure it out.
And that was another one of life’s little reminders. Marriage is all about figuring it out together, learning from each other, and knowing you never have to face anything alone.